12 May 2010

You Shouldn't Read This Post

I'm not even sure what I plan to write today. My head is full. I need to clear my head, so this is what I do. I write. I'll consider publishing it. I'll consider not. I'll second guess myself if I do publish it. It's going to be far more cynical than anything you've heard from me in the past. That's where I am, and maybe more people will be praying for me because of this post. Maybe not. Maybe I just need to write it and post it either way. So here goes...

Have you ever noticed that when you're going through a challenging time, there is always someone who knows what you should do? They aren't in your situation, but they think they've "been there." They don't know all the details or what your day-to-day life is like, but they know what will work to fix all the problems in your life. They know what you should do even though they can't possibly have all the information. You know these people too, right?

I know a lot of people like this. I know a lot of people who seem to know what I should do right now, but, none of them are me. None of them are married to my husband. None of them have my kids or even a husband and children with the exact personalities of my husband, my children or myself. None of them have sought the will of God in order to discover the path God intends for my life, and, if they said they had, for the most part, I would be skeptical. Get your own ducks in a row, you know?

These people frown upon me. I can't make them happy. Their ideas bombard my mind. 

"Do this."

"Don't do that."

"Stop what you're doing."

"Do it the way I did it."

"I understand."

"I've been exactly where you are."

"I know what you should do and when you should do it."

"You're doing it wrong."

To those people, I say, hear this...

Frowning causes wrinkles. Stop frowning on me and preserve your plush skin. I'm not you, so I won't be making you happy. Your ideas are rarely solicited, so stop talking. I'm not going to do "this" because it logistically doesn't work for my family. I'm not going to do "that" either because that isn't what God has asked of me at this time in my life. The way you did it isn't going to work for me because, as I mentioned, I'm not you. You don't understand because you aren't me. You're not in my situation. You don't know all the details. You don't know how God is stirring my heart or the heart of my husband or the hearts of my children. You can't possibly understand. You haven't been exactly where I am. That's not physically possible because, once again, you're not me. I'm doing what I know to be right because I am a woman led by God to do exactly that. What I'm doing may be wrong for you, but it is not wrong for me.

Even so, I appreciate you. So here's what I need. Pray for me. Check on me. I need to talk sometimes. Sometimes I need to be distracted. Sometimes I need to focus on the issue at hand. Encourage me with scripture. Be there when I need you to be. Surprise me by being there unexpectedly at just the right moment. And, thanks. Thanks so much for being a part of my life. I need people who care about me and love me right now, and I do appreciate you so much. If you want to be the person I need right now, this is what I need from you. If you do any of these things, you'll rock!

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